You need to make a self care plan
The moment your child is born, they become your life. When they’re happy, you’re happy, and when they’re sad, you’re sad. Buying things for them or taking them places they like to go to becomes your new version of fun. But that’s not all…there’s the running of the house…the cooking, cleaning, playdates, grocery shopping, doctor appointments and more. Moms put themselves on the back burner in order to keep all the moving parts of running a household going. All these things are important and needed, and are what makes us moms amazing (as well as somewhat of a superhero!) But, and this is a big but, we can not let ourselves be put on hold after becoming a mother. It’s important to find the time….and MAKE the time…to do what makes you, you.
Don’t lose yourself
Of course it’s unreasonable to expect to be able to do everything you were able to do before kids. Gone are the days of spontaneously deciding on a night out with your significant other like you did pre-kids, or on a last minute impromptu road trip with your best friend like in your college days. You’ll find your time and energy stretched thin in ways they haven’t been before. And that’s ok. But don’t lose yourself in the process.
Find your non-negotiables
These look different for every person. Basically, they’re the things you need to make you feel like yourself. For me these are having time to train, having time to work, and getting my nails done every few weeks. As you can see, these will vary widely from person to person. Some may be just-for-fun things (girls night out, pedicure, alone time to read a book) while others may be physical- or mental-health related (working out, taking a weekly stroll through the park alone, signing up for a dieting service). Sit down and make a list of these things. Think of hobbies you were good at/are good at and make sure to set aside the time to work on them.
Stop putting yourself last! Trust me when I say setting aside time for yourself will make you a better mother. For more on this topic, check out my recent blog post Taking Care of Yourself IS Taking Care of Your Kids.