Doing everything “right” and still feeling stuck is frustrating. It is also more common than you think.
In this episode of Unfiltered Fit Life, I talk about why so many women struggle with fitness even when they are disciplined, motivated, and consistent on paper.
The issue is not food. It is not workouts.It is not hormones.
It is behavior.
I talk about how ego shows up as perfectionism, fear, and all or nothing thinking, and how those patterns keep you from showing up at all.
In this episode, I break down:
• why repeating the same strategies leads to the same outcome
• how fear of not being perfect blocks progress
• why behavior change matters more than tweaks
• what actually changed when I stopped fighting myself
If you have been stuck in the cycle of trying harder without seeing results, this episode will challenge the way you think about fitness and about yourself.
This is not about doing more.
It is about doing things differently.
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More about the Unfiltered Fit Life podcast
Ever wish you had a fit and straightforward BFF with over 15 years of experience to help you filter through all the information regarding fitness, nutrition, and life?
That’s exactly what you’ll get when you listen to the Unfiltered Fit Life Podcast.
Join Former Bikini Olympia Champion, mom of 2, and fitness coach Nathalia Melo each week as she shares fitness, nutrition, and life tips to help busy working moms simplify their fitness journey so they can learn easy and simple strategies on how to lose weight and feel sexy AF.
After helping over 5000 busy working moms, Nathalia has found the blueprint to fitness, nutrition, and life success, which she will be sharing in this podcast: actionable tips that will help busy working moms be more present at work and at home.
This show is for you if you realize that nothing good comes from your comfort zone and are ready to challenge yourself to achieve great things. Follow Unfiltered Fit Life wherever you are listening to join us each week for a splash of sass, humor, and a whole lotta truth.
The podcast transcript for this episode of the Unfiltered Fit Life podcast follows
Trying to “Do Everything Right” But Still Stuck? You Need to Hear This.
Introduction
Nathalia Melo:
I open this episode by speaking directly to women who feel like they are doing all the right things with fitness but still feel stuck. I talk about the common belief that the problem must be food, cardio, calories, or hormones, and I challenge that idea right away. I explain that this episode is going to feel uncomfortable for some listeners because it goes deeper than strategies. I make it clear that this conversation is about behavior, ego, and what is happening between your ears.
The Real Problem Is Not Food or Training
Nathalia Melo:
I explain why most women believe their fitness struggles come down to tweaking nutrition, workouts, or timing, when in reality those are not the root issues. I share that after nearly two decades of coaching, especially high-achieving women, the biggest obstacle I see is behavior. I introduce the idea that ego plays a much larger role than most women want to admit and explain why this topic often feels triggering.
The Simon Cowell Story and Why It Matters
Nathalia Melo:
I share a story about watching a documentary where Simon Cowell auditioned boys to form a new band. I explain how turnout was unexpectedly low because many potential candidates did not feel ready or good enough to show up. I highlight that two of the boys who almost did not audition ended up making the band. I use this story to illustrate how doubt, fear, and waiting to feel ready often prevent people from taking opportunities that could change everything.
How Ego Shows Up as Perfectionism
Nathalia Melo:
I connect the audition story to fitness and explain how many women tell themselves they are not ready, life is too busy, or that if they cannot do things perfectly there is no point in starting. I explain that this is ego, not humility. I talk about how high-achieving women often believe they should already know how to do this because they were once fit in a different season of life, even though their responsibilities are completely different now.
Fear Disguised as Selflessness
Nathalia Melo:
I explain how many women appear selfless on the outside by putting kids, work, and everyone else first, but underneath that behavior is fear. Fear of failure. Fear of losing control. Fear of not living up to unrealistic expectations. I challenge the idea that women are truly in control when they feel dissatisfied and stuck despite trying the same strategies over and over again.
Why Repeating the Same Strategy Guarantees the Same Result
Nathalia Melo:
I talk about how continuing to repeat strategies that are not working creates a one hundred percent failure rate. I explain why refusing to admit you do not know what to do keeps you stuck. I challenge the belief that you must be perfect to start and remind listeners that no one is perfect in any area of life, including parenting, work, or relationships.
My Personal Experience With Ego and Control
Nathalia Melo:
I share my own experience as a former world champion bodybuilder and explain how ego showed up for me. I talk about how the strategies that worked in one season of life no longer fit later seasons. I explain how being dissatisfied with my body affected my confidence, relationships, and willingness to show up for opportunities, even when I was highly competent at my job.
Why Extreme Effort Is Not the Answer
Nathalia Melo:
I explain why cutting carbs, adding cardio, chasing detoxes, peptides, or extreme plans will never lead to sustainable results. I call out the idea that going to the gym five or six days a week automatically means progress. I explain that effort without results is not a badge of honor and that there are no awards for trying to figure this out alone.
What Actually Changed Everything
Nathalia Melo:
I explain that my body and life changed when I stopped fighting myself and addressed my behavior. I talk about how perfectionism and constant overthinking robbed me of peace, presence, and enjoyment. I explain that real change happened when I learned to adapt, set boundaries, and stop forcing outcomes that did not align with my life.
Why Behavior Comes First
Nathalia Melo:
I explain why the first pillar of my program is behavior, not nutrition or workouts. I talk about why accountability alone is not the solution and why mindset, self-trust, boundaries, and systems matter more. I explain that behavior change is not about motivation or discipline, but about learning how to show up imperfectly and consistently.
Final Thoughts
Nathalia Melo:
I close the episode by returning to the Simon Cowell story and reminding listeners that none of those boys felt ready. They showed up anyway. I ask listeners to reflect on how many times they have not shown up for themselves because of fear, perfectionism, or ego. I challenge listeners to stop waiting for the perfect time and to consider doing things differently instead of trying harder.
